I’m more English than you, you cunt.
I can prove it, I don’t even know who I am,
As a citizen of nowhere,
Upon whom war has been declared,
I’m more English than you, you cunt.

What could be more appropriate,
Than nobody attacking nothing to go nowhere?
If you’re gonna live a lie,
You better live a big one.
I’m more English than you, you cunt.
I’m the consumer of illusions,
I’m more English than you, you cunt.

If you think you might know who you are,
One day after the cull you cunt,
Once nobody and nowhere has been removed,
Because it means, it means, it means it you what?
I’m just like you,
I’m more English than you, you cunt.

Waiting for the blush of tumours,
You what does Brexit mean to bloom,
To bloom, you cunt.
I can tell you anything,
I’m more English than you mate,
I’m as English as they come you cunt,
As long as they come from round here, you cunt.

I haven’t got a fucking clue who I am,
But if it was an English competition I would win,
Because I’m full to the brim.

Waiting for the waves we rule to come crashing in,
But only on you, you cunt.
I’m more English than you mate,
I don’t even care who I fuckin’ am.

I’m more English than a fried egg,
I’m more English than bacon,
I’m more English than a full English,
I’m so English I don’t even need to take back control,
Because I never lost it.
I’m more English than you mate,
I can hate, hate, hate,
I can piss myself up a wall,
I’m more English than you mate,
Like a flag, I’m a cunt like that.

My mate James said all his mates were dead at 50,
But I’m 53,
I’m more English than you James, you dead cunt.
I’m more English than that,
I’m as English as they come mate,
As long as they come from round here.

I’m as English as blame,
I’m nostalgic for things that haven’t even happened.
I’m more English than Dominic Cumberbatch,
A Bandersnatch,
A football match,
A greasy snatch,
And the Nights’ Watch.

I’m more English than you, you cunt.
I’m frothy man,
A tootly fruit,
A court date suit.

I’m more English than what happened yesterday,
I can keep cunted and carry it off.
I’m more English than mustard, ya cunt.
The darts,
Them too,
And Showaddywaddy

I’m more English than Boris Johnson,
I’ve got a tweed tractor,
And a Barbour carport,
Short back and snides,
And I’m mainly Welsh ya cunt.

What could be more English than that?
You, you cunt.